RE: 20 Things You Need To Know About Evil SantaPosted on Wed, Dec 17, 2008
By popular demand, here’s 20 Things you need to know about Evil Santa!
- Evil Santa will come down your chimney and steal all your honey bar b que chicken wings out of your frig.
- Evil Santa will track you down and slap the sh*t out of you and says: “What? No cookies, Bitch?! Where’s my f*ckin’ Milk at?!”
- Evil Santa will sneak in through your window and steal the money you were gonna use to pay the light bill.
- Evil Santa is White. I’m not being racist. That’s just the truth
- Evil Santa’s favorite song is “Peaches” by Presidents Of The United States
- Interestingly enough, Evil Santa’s a registered Democrat
- Evil Santa still believes in Microsoft Vista. The Ultimate version, not those other crappy ones..
- Evil Santa considers his jingle bells his ‘Christmas Bling’.
- Evil Santa made me watch Rush Hour 3 at gun point. God, that movie was bad…
- Evil Santa just kicked my a$$ at Madden 08!!
- Evil Santa watches Desperate Housewives religiously
- Evil Santa’s real name is Dibley
- Evil Santa is allergic to flour. That’s why he didn’t eat the cookies you left out for him when you were a kid.
- Be careful! Evil Santa’s pimp hand is strong…
- Evil Santa prefers the Zune over the iPod. But he does own an iPhone…
- Evil Santa just saved a bundle on his car insurance… BY NOT HAVING ANY CAR INSURANCE!!!
- Evil Santa is responsible for the Xbox360 “Red Ring of Death”
- Evil Santa is a “Trekker”, not a “Trekkie”. People have died making that mistake
- If Cavemen and Astronauts got into a fight, who would win? Evil Santa thinks it depends on if the Cavemen use fire…
- Evil Santa uses H&R Block to pay his taxes.
